Meet the Animals
They have names. They have opinions. And we're pretty sure they think this is their ranch.
Honestly… they're probably right.
Every animal at HolmesStead has a story, a personality, and in some cases, a complete disregard for personal boundaries. Some came here intentionally. Others… well, ranch math happened. Together, they're the heart, entertainment and occasional chaos behind HolmesStead.
.jpg)
The Ranch Manager
Kahlua
Kahlua is the undisputed queen of HolmesStead. She spends most of her day monitoring fence lines and judging everyone's fashion choices. Her stare is legendary, and she is 100% convinced she signed the mortgage.
LOVES: Organic carrots & authority
KNOWN FOR: The judgmental side-eye
Head of Treat Acquisition
Jesse
Jesse operates on a very simple system: if you have hands, they should be scratching her neck or passing out treats.
LOVES: her emotional support horse, kahlua
KNOWN FOR: being a grass and treat hog
Director of Space Violations
Baby Moose
Moose might be small and a lover, but has a complete disregard for personal boundaries and will happily follow you into the house if the door is left ajar or use you as his personal jumping board.
LOVES: cuddles
Known for: zero personal space
The Parkour Department
Smoke & Missy
These two are the dynamic duo of the goat world. If there's something to jump on, they've jumped on it. If there's something to chew on that isn't food, they've tried it. They bring the energy and the 'ranch math' realization to HolmesStead.
LOVES: Vertical surfaces & mischief
Head of Security
Shaq and His Ladies
Shaq takes his role very seriously. He protects his girls, and looks so handsome doing it. Fun fact, we have a handicap hen named Gimpy. She’s sweet, determined, a little unconventional, and living proof that different doesn’t mean less. Come meet her and there’s a very good chance you’ll leave wondering how a chicken named Gimpy somehow became your favorite animal at the ranch.
OCCUPATION: increasing protein intake egg by egg
Chief Cuddle Officer
Biscuit
A fluffy chunk of pure joy. Biscuit is the heart of the welcoming committee. If you're feeling stressed, five minutes with Biscuit is a guaranteed cure. He's treat-obsessed and cuddle-ready.
LOVES: Fluffiness & treats
Every Ranch Needs a Good Management Team.
Ours just happens to be made up of a bossy horse, a treat-obsessed cow, several goats with questionable decision-making skills, one very dedicated rooster, an inspirational chicken and a fluffy chunk named Biscuit.
Now Come Meet Them.
Pictures are cute. Cow kisses, goat cuddles and Kahlua's judgmental stare are better in person.